Godly Relationship & Advocate Ministry: A SICK MARRIAGE & ITS CURE - BY DR. HESPEY

Godly Relationship & Advocate Ministry: A SICK MARRIAGE & ITS CURE - BY DR. HESPEY: A SICK MARRIAGE & ITS CURE WRITTEN BY DR. HESPEY The Thought Of Something Falling Sick And The Need For Revival Came To My Mind. As A...

Godly Relationship & Advocate Ministry: THE UNTERMINATED PREGNANCY - BY DR. HESPEY

Godly Relationship & Advocate Ministry: THE UNTERMINATED PREGNANCY - BY DR. HESPEY: A SHORT STORY & A LESSON FOR SINGLE GUYS/LADIES THE UNTERMINATED PREGNANCY WRITTEN BY DR. HESPEY It All Started About 3 Decades Ago....

THE BEST GIFT FROM A DAD - WRITTEN BY DR. HESPEY.

THE BEST GIFT FROM A DAD.

WRITTEN BY DR. HESPEY

INTRODUCTION:

Few Months Back, I Recall Listening To A Muslim Scholar’s Ministration. This Ministration Talks About A Father Who Call Up All His Children To Question Them About What He Had Best Done For Them As A Father.

The First Child Said “father, You Gave Us Good Education.” The Father Responded By Saying “yes, But That Wasn’t My Best.”

The Second Child Said “oh Father, You Gave Us Good Morals.” The Father Still Replied With “yes, But It Still Not My Best.”

Another One Said “father, We Never Lack Anything In All Ramifications.” The Father Said “yes, But This Wasn’t Still My Best For You All.

Then With Curiosity, The Last Child Said “father, They Taught Us That Our Best Days Are Usually Ahead Of Us Not Behind Us. But Since You Claim Yours Is Behind You, What Then Was The Best Thing You Ever Did For Us?”

The Father Responded By Saying “yes, It Was My Best And It’s Behind Me, But It’s Serving You Till This Very Moment. The Best Thing I Ever Did For You All Was That Before You Were Born, I Choose A Good Woman (Mother) For You.”

MESSAGE:

Just As You Are Shock Right Now On Hearing This From A Man, So Was I When I First Listened To That Ministration From An Intelligent Muslim Scholar.

In Relationship And Marriage, You Seriously Need To Know That Your Choice Of Man Or Woman Is A Big Determinant Factor On The Kind Of Home You’re Going To Build. The Choice Of A Partner Will Surely Affect The Quality Of The Home You Build.

What Manner Of Woman Are You Toasting As A Guy? What Manner Of Man Are You Going Out With As A Lady?

My Life As Case Study, I Can Tell That I Got This Best Gift From My Dad As Well, He Got For Himself And For Us A Woman Who Led Us To Throne Of Mercy, A Woman Who Mumbles Every Morning Like She Was Out Of Her Mind.

I Could Recall There Was A Time I Questioned Her For Mumbling, She Said “son, This Kind Of Prayer Is What Saved My Life. You Really Need To Try It Sometime.”

In Real Sense, She Was A Communicator With Christ.

She Usually Drag Me To Church, Especially The Mid-week Programs. And She Did Something That I Detested Back Then.

In The Baptist Setting, The Children (Age 2 - 10) Department Known As “the Sunbeam” Is Usually Being Coordinated By The WMU (Women Missionary Union) Of Which Mum As A Woman Belong To. I Could Remember Most Of The Time, This Woman Would Voluntarily Bring Me A Task From Church Without My Consent. There Was This Year She Got Home On A Saturday Night Only To Hand Me Over A List Of Bible Verses To Be Memorized And Read The Following Day In The Church Full Of Its Members.

All These Got Me Running, I Was Like “mum, Why?” Her Response Was “hey Son, One Day You’ll Thank Me For Having God In Your Life.”

And Yea, She Was Right, Because Right Now, I’m Talking To Jesus, And It was Her Who Got Me Talking To Jesus.

Dad’s Choice Of Woman Got Me The Life That A Lot Of People Are Praising Right Now. His Choice Of A Good Woman Make Me Who I Am Growing To Become.

What Do You Think Would Have Become Of Me If Dad Had Settle For Something Less? What Do You Think Would Have Become Of Me If He Had Married The Wrong Woman? What Exactly Would I Have Turn Out To Become If He Had Chosen A Woman Who Didn’t Know Who Christ Is?

CONCLUSION:

There Is A Wrong Way To Do This, But There Is No Bad Time To Start. You Can Start Now, Start Thinking Of Best Gift For Your Unborn Kids. Woo The Right Woman As A Guy, Accept The Right Man Into Your Life As A Lady. Settle Not For What Just Fits You But Won’t Fit Well For Your Unborn Children. Ensure What Fits You, Will Equally Fit Your Children Well.

Settle For What Is Right, Because This Is A Major Determinant Factor Of The Kind Of Children You Will Raise. It Is A Major Determinant Factor Of The Kind Of Society We Create As Families.

Remember That Choosing The Right Man Or Woman Is Only Possible With God On The Throne. It Doesn’t Matter How Far You Go In Search Of Him Or Her, Just Let God Be The Foundation Of Your Search.

Thanks for reading!!! If this blessed you, share to bless others! To read more from us, visit: Www.drhezpey.wordPress.com or Www.abstinencetillmarriage.wordpress.com or Www.godlyrelationshipadvocateministry.blogspot.com

For enquiries/counsellings/invitations/sponsorship/partnership: 09079970736 (WHATSAPP) 07061522492 (VOICE CALLS)

© ODERINDE TAIWO JOEL

    DR. HESPEY (2021)

THE UNDERSIZED BOOT - WRITTEN BY DR. HESPEY

THE UNDERSIZED BOOT: PERSPECTIVE FROM THE FOOTBALLER.

WRITTEN BY DR. HESPEY 

INTRODUCTORY PART:

For those that are a bit familiar with the life of a footballer, we know it's a life that works to perfection only when it possess the right tools & mindset.

Solomon as a footballer just got a new pair of boot. This new pair of boot is costly, beautiful & possesses a quality material, but with a defect of being an undersized one for solomon.

Solomon, seeing this pair of boot as the most quality one he has ever seen, so he couldn't let go of the fact that it's not for him. He tried forcing things, but this didn't go well with him.

First, everything Solomon did with this pair of boot on him, never went well, just because the boot on him wasn't compatible with his legs. He was never productive & in the end, he got hurt, on removing the boots, his feet were already bloodheaded & black due to the force received from an undersized boot.

MESSAGE:

Bringing this perspective to our relationship life, most times we tend to force things, maybe because he/she is handsome, beautiful, rich, maybe because they possess some qualities we thought we would never come across from someone else or maybe because we are getting stuck.

All these are nice, but in real sense, like Solomon who had the same mindset, we are being hopeless & faithless.

When someone isn't meant for you, it doesn't matter the effort you dip into it, it's just not gonna work, Just because you deserve someone better. Settling for them may not be God's plan for you. Settling there may be less than His plans.

I have seen God use both the bad & the good circumstances to put us in our right mind.

I have seen someone holding on to what's not meant to be, but God uses such to hurt him so badly until he was strong enough to let it go.

I have seen the same God using bad leaders as instruments of hardship just to pull people back to the right lane.

Don't wait until that undersized boot in your life start serving as a means of hardship.

Before it causes you more harm like the undersized boots of Solomon, you got to let it go. You deserve to be happy & productive. But this can only happen when you're with the right tools in your hands.

CONCLUSION:

Solomon became productive after he let go of the mindset that the boot was the best type he could ever get. He came across a better one which makes him more unique & fruitful in his career.

Like Solomon, brothers & sisters: that relationship may be the undersized boot in your life. The partner may be the wrong one for you.

Craving for something beautiful, handsome, equipped, quality or for love doesn't have to be at the expense of your happiness. Let it go, God's got the best in store.

Thanks for reading!!! If this blessed you, share to bless others! To read more from us, visit: Www.drhezpey.wordPress.com or Www.abstinencetillmarriage.wordpress.com or Www.godlyrelationshipadvocateministry.blogspot.com

For enquiries/counsellings/invitations/sponsorship/partnership: 09079970736 (WHATSAPP) 07061522492 (VOICE CALLS)

© ODERINDE TAIWO JOEL

    DR. HESPEY (2021)

LOVE OR INFATUATION? - WRITTEN BY DR. HESPEY

INFATUATION OR LOVE?

WRITTEN BY DR. HESPEY

INTRODUCTION:

Love and infatuation has been recorded to be a major part in the causes of most broken relationships, which brings about being used, being dumped, heartbreaks & lots more. Here today, we will be looking at how to categorize & line out the major differences between these two words. And furthermore more, we will answer and explain some questions in full details.

DEFINITION:

But first, let's begin with some definitions: The Merriam-Webster dictionary's definitions of love and infatuation are very much simple, understandable & well defined: first, it says: LOVE Is "A Warm Attachment, Enthusiasm, Or Devotion To Another Person," while INFATUATION on the other hand is "a feeling of foolish or obsessively strong love for, admiration for, or interest in someone or something."

Basically, love is a deep, committed attachment to someone, while infatuation is a shallow-imagination of love.

Now one of the questions that is likely to cross your mind as you read is: What then are the signs of love and infatuation?

In real sense and in medical, we believe that whatsoever happens must have come with diverse of signs or symptoms. One of the major sign of infatuation is that it tends to happen at the beginning of relationships. It is usually marked by a sense of excitement and great happiness, and it's often accompanied by lust and a feeling of newness, elation and rapid expansion with a person.

Now to the most common signs: to a counsellor like us, if you're the type that feels obsessive, irrationally excited, and, the worst, really horny, then you're probably in the infatuation phase of love. Infatuation in its occurrence mostly makes you feel great, in fact, you may also feel slightly insecure because things are so new and they aren't real.

But my dear, when it is love, there's a bond in there, there's a commitment, there's a connection (whether physical or spiritual). Love tends to be something that is in form of a construction process, it takes place over a long period of time, where you commence with a foundation laying, a process where you commence getting to know somebody and you're building a connection. It is a process where you try creating an emotional safety, and you're able to portray an act that shows you can be easily hurt or harmed and open to attack with the person involved.

When you love someone, you know personal details about them, even their worst past or present (whether hearing it from the person or finding it out yourself) and you still feel safe staying and being open about yourself as well, But, love and infatuation are not mutually exclusive, because most people in a relationship are infatuated with their partners to a certain degree (once the limit is reached, then it opens that they aren't in love).

Now the next question that is likely to cross your mind at this point is: Is infatuation constructive or destructive?

To my knowledge base on this counselling career so far, infatuation in most cases is sometimes constructive when it receive a second wave, and on the other hand, it is destructive when it's being declined." Basically, if you and your partner both have the new relationship on a higher level, that's great! But if you're dealing with love that's not being returned, you should probably let it go, it signifies infatuation.

Times without number, the question as to whether infatuation later turning out to love is possible has been asked.

From the above paragraph, infatuation phase can actually change and turn into a loving, committed, dedicated and long-lasting relationship, but the time frame and probability for such occurrence is never to be predicted. Now the real deal is that, when you're in love with somebody or infatuated with somebody, you stop seeking others and you focus just on that person. Only time will tell really if infatuation will develop into a long-term attachment and sense of love.

CONCLUSION:

However, if you later discover that you've been in an infatuated relationship and you're sure that God is still leading you there, there are certain things we can actually recommend that you should do to strengthen your relationship and move it from the destructive phase to a constructive phase.

Firstly, give your relationship some time, like I said in the above paragraph, it's probability & occurrence is unpredictable, things won't happen overnight.

Secondly, Communication is always important in a relationship, and so is knowing when to reach a concession. But overall, a sense of commitment, dedication, selflessness and willingness to the relationship is what will create the attachment needed to fall in love and get it moving rightly.

Thanks for reading!!!

If this blessed you, share to bless others!!!

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Www.drhezpey.wordPress.com

or

Www.abstinencetillmarriage.wordpress.com or

Www.godlyrelationshipadvocateministry.blogspot.com

For enquiries/counsellings/invitations/sponsorship/partnership:

09079970736 (WHATSAPP)

07061522492 (VOICE CALLS)

© ODERINDE TAIWO JOEL

    DR. HESPEY

YOUR GAIN AFTER AN ABORTION - WRITTEN BY DR. HESPEY

YOUR GAIN AFTER AN ABORTION

WRITTEN BY DR. HESPEY

INTRODUCTION:

It occurs to me that knowing the truth isn't the same as implementing the truth already known. Many ladies know abstinence until marriage to be the best option, but the act of sexual indulgence is being practice because abortion exist in their dictionary.

Abortion as generally known is the medical process (either by pill or surgery) of ending a pregnancy so it does not result in the birth of a baby.

Research has just shed more light on the disadvantages of having an abortion and what you stand to gain after its indulgence.

According to The Foundation for Africa Cultural Heritage, CANCER is now one of the risks associated with undergoing an abortion.

According to FACH president, Dr. Nkechi Asogwa, many cases of breast cancer have been linked to the aftermath of an abortion.

According to her:

“When you terminate a pregnancy you end many ongoing processes in the body such as the preparation of breast for the secretion of milk. So the tissues that were cut off suddenly would become fragile and they can trigger the formation of cancerous cells in the breast.

Side effects may occur with induced abortion, whether surgical or by pill.

MEDICAL IMPACT OF ABORTION:

These side effects include the followings: abdominal pain and cramping, nausea, vomiting, and diarrhea.

Abortion also carries the risk of significant complications such as bleeding, infection, and damage to organs. Enquiries shows that serious complications occur in less than 1 out of 100 early abortions and in about 1 out of every 50 later abortions. Those serious Complications may include:

Heavy Bleeding, Infection, Incomplete Abortion (leading to more complications as far as sonography is concern), Damage to the Cervix, Scarring of the Uterine Lining, Perforation of the Uterus and in the end Damage to Internal Organs or Death.

EMOTIONAL AND PSYCHOLOGICAL IMPACT OF ABORTION:

There is evidence that abortion is associated with a decrease in both emotional and physical health. For some women these negative emotions may be very strong, and can appear within days or after many years. This psychological response is a form of post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

symptoms that may likely show up after this process includes:

1. Eating disorders.

2. Relationship problems.

3. Guilt.

4. Depression

5.Flashbacks of abortion.

6. Suicidal thoughts.

7. Sexual dysfunction &

8. Spiritual Consequences.

In real sense, today's article isn't coming to scare you, but to give you an insight of how to make the right decision.

In every of the aforementioned impacts of Abortion, no effect relating to whichever guy you had sex with is involved. Then think about it, who loses in the end?

Stay safe and help yourself to be healthy and enjoy life.

Thanks for reading!!!

If this blessed you, share to bless others!!!

To read more from us, visit:

Www.drhezpey.wordPress.com

Www.abstinencetillmarriage.wordpress.com or

Www.godlyrelationshipadvocateministry.blogspot.com

For enquiries/counsellings/invitations/sponsorship/partnership:

09097964134 (WHATSAPP)

07061522492 (VOICE CALLS)

© ODERINDE TAIWO JOEL

    DR. HESPEY

DARLING SISTERS: GOD IS SAYING, "YOU ARE NOT ALONE" - WRITTEN BY DR. HESPEY

DARLING SISTERS: GOD IS SAYING, "YOU ARE NOT ALONE"

WRITTEN BY DR. HESPEY

INTRODUCTION:

Recovering from sexual assault takes time, and the healing process can be painful. But dear sisters, you can regain your sense of control, earn more value, rebuild your self-worth, and learn to get healed.

MAJOR LESSONS:

Regardless of age or gender, the impact of sexual violence goes far beyond any physical injuries. The trauma of being raped or sexually assaulted can be shattering, leaving you feeling scared, ashamed, and alone or plagued by nightmares, memories, and other unpleasant memories. The world doesn’t feel like a safe place anymore. You no longer trust others. You don’t even trust yourself. You may question your judgment, your self-worth, and even your sanity. You may blame yourself for what happened or believe that you’re “dirty” or “damaged goods.” The trauma of being raped sometimes make relationships feel dangerous & it in turn in most cases makes intimacy impossible. And on top of that, like many rape survivors, you may struggle with PTSD, anxiety, and depression.

I need to let you know that what you’re experiencing is a normal reaction to trauma. Your feelings of helplessness, shame, defectiveness, and self-blame are symptoms, not reality. No matter how difficult it may seem, with these article, you can come to terms with what happened, regain your sense of safety and trust, and learn to heal and proceed.

CONSOLATION MESSAGE:

Being raped is a worst crime, but nonetheless, it doesn't worth ending your life because of its shame, agony & what have you.

My message to you today is simple, God hasn't been silent over your case, He is telling to tell you these:

- KNOW THAT YOU ARE NOT ALONE:

Psalm 9:9 promises us that “The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.”

What happened to you wasn't at your will, you were held & assaulted. But Your pain, fear, anger, and sadness are not too much for God. God still loves you today just as much as He did the day He created you. God sees you in your pain and grieves with you, just like He does for all of His children.

After being physically and emotionally abused, a woman named Hagar finally decided she couldn’t take it anymore. She runs away, but in Genesis 16, an angel of the Lord meets her along the road and tells her that her story isn’t over. “She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: ‘You are the God who sees me,’ for she said, ‘I have now seen the One who sees me’” (Genesis 16:13).

God wants to comfort you and heal you, even if you’re angry at Him. If you’re mad at God, tell Him. He can take it. Pour out all your emotions. Don’t hold anything back. God will meet you in your pain. Just like He promises in Psalm 147:3, “[The Lord] heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”

- BELIEVE IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT:

It can be easy to think, Well, maybe I should have done this or that, then this wouldn’t have happened. 

Your mode of dressing actually isn't the major cause of it. Though what you wear actually matter, but it doesn't matter what you were doing. Rape and sexual assault are never your fault. Even if your attacker says, “You made me do it,” it’s not your fault.

At the time when God wrote the first rules for His people, women were considered a man’s property. God’s laws set Israel apart from its neighboring countries by elevating a woman’s status and protecting her. The punishment for rape was death for the rapist. The punishment for adultery was death of both parties involved, but God makes a distinction for rape: “Only the man who has done this shall die. Do nothing to the woman; she has committed no sin deserving death” (Deuteronomy 22:25-26).

Nothing you can do would ever make rape or assault your fault, God already made that clear in His laws from the beginning. You did not deserve it. Rape is a sin, but it’s not your sin; it’s the sin of the person who harmed you against your will. 

- BELIEVE YOU ARE STILL VALUABLE:

Rape victim is not who you are. You are a son or daughter of the God who made the universe. 

Your value comes from God not from the act. He created you, and He is the only one who can define you. You are not dirty or used up. You were fearfully and wonderfully made by a loving God (Psalm 139).

God proved His love for you and your value to Him by sending His Son to earth to remove the sin gap between God and His people once and for all. Just consider the beginning of one of the most famous verses in the Bible, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16).  

If you have never asked Jesus into your life, reading this, let Him meet you where you are right now. Through Jesus, we’re able to have a relationship with God, which comes with some incredible benefits which comprises of hope and healing for today and forever. 

- YOU ARE STILL IN A SAFE PLACE:

Being rapes in the church or mosque doesn't signify that the place isn't a place of refuge anymore. It doesn't say God has failed us. Sometimes, we feel like we have to get our stuff together before we can come to church. But one way God speaks to us, heals us and comforts us is through His people. When you’ve experienced a trauma like rape, you need to connect with other Christians who love you and will walk through this with you with trust. 

Healing happens as we bring the dark parts of our past into the light. One of Jesus’ close friends, John, describes how this works, writing, “God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin” (1 John 1:5-7).

When we keep what was done to us to ourselves, we give the hurt, the pain, and the shame the perfect place to grow, taking over our hearts like mold spores multiplying in darkness. To move forward requires us to open the door to our hearts, allowing Jesus and others to shed light on the sins committed against us and the lies we believed about them.

BRIEFED WAYS OUT OF THE TRAUMA:

1. Discussing The Rape Incidence With Someone Trustworthy.

2. Assure Yourself That It's Not Your Fault.

3. Don't Beat Yourself So Hard Over Its Remembrance.

4. Bring Your Soul Back To Life By Being Strong Again.

5. Enjoin Yourself In The Circle Of Most Trusted Ones.

6. Breed Yourself Not To Be Breed.

Thanks for reading!!!

If this blessed you, bless others by sharing.

To read more from us, visit:

Www.drhezpey.wordPress.com

Www.abstinencetillmarriage.wordpress.com or

Www.godlyrelationshipadvocateministry.blogspot.com

For enquiries/counsellings/invitations/sponsorship/partnership:

09097964134 (WHATSAPP)

07061522492 (VOICE CALLS)

© ODERINDE TAIWO JOEL

    DR. HESPEY