DARLING SISTERS: GOD IS SAYING, "YOU ARE NOT ALONE"
WRITTEN BY DR. HESPEY
INTRODUCTION:
Recovering from sexual assault takes time, and the healing process can be painful. But dear sisters, you can regain your sense of control, earn more value, rebuild your self-worth, and learn to get healed.
MAJOR LESSONS:
Regardless of age or gender, the impact of sexual violence goes far beyond any physical injuries. The trauma of being raped or sexually assaulted can be shattering, leaving you feeling scared, ashamed, and alone or plagued by nightmares, memories, and other unpleasant memories. The world doesn’t feel like a safe place anymore. You no longer trust others. You don’t even trust yourself. You may question your judgment, your self-worth, and even your sanity. You may blame yourself for what happened or believe that you’re “dirty” or “damaged goods.” The trauma of being raped sometimes make relationships feel dangerous & it in turn in most cases makes intimacy impossible. And on top of that, like many rape survivors, you may struggle with PTSD, anxiety, and depression.
I need to let you know that what you’re experiencing is a normal reaction to trauma. Your feelings of helplessness, shame, defectiveness, and self-blame are symptoms, not reality. No matter how difficult it may seem, with these article, you can come to terms with what happened, regain your sense of safety and trust, and learn to heal and proceed.
CONSOLATION MESSAGE:
Being raped is a worst crime, but nonetheless, it doesn't worth ending your life because of its shame, agony & what have you.
My message to you today is simple, God hasn't been silent over your case, He is telling to tell you these:
- KNOW THAT YOU ARE NOT ALONE:
Psalm 9:9 promises us that “The LORD is a refuge for the oppressed, a stronghold in times of trouble.”
What happened to you wasn't at your will, you were held & assaulted. But Your pain, fear, anger, and sadness are not too much for God. God still loves you today just as much as He did the day He created you. God sees you in your pain and grieves with you, just like He does for all of His children.
After being physically and emotionally abused, a woman named Hagar finally decided she couldn’t take it anymore. She runs away, but in Genesis 16, an angel of the Lord meets her along the road and tells her that her story isn’t over. “She gave this name to the Lord who spoke to her: ‘You are the God who sees me,’ for she said, ‘I have now seen the One who sees me’” (Genesis 16:13).
God wants to comfort you and heal you, even if you’re angry at Him. If you’re mad at God, tell Him. He can take it. Pour out all your emotions. Don’t hold anything back. God will meet you in your pain. Just like He promises in Psalm 147:3, “[The Lord] heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”
- BELIEVE IT’S NOT YOUR FAULT:
It can be easy to think, Well, maybe I should have done this or that, then this wouldn’t have happened.
Your mode of dressing actually isn't the major cause of it. Though what you wear actually matter, but it doesn't matter what you were doing. Rape and sexual assault are never your fault. Even if your attacker says, “You made me do it,” it’s not your fault.
At the time when God wrote the first rules for His people, women were considered a man’s property. God’s laws set Israel apart from its neighboring countries by elevating a woman’s status and protecting her. The punishment for rape was death for the rapist. The punishment for adultery was death of both parties involved, but God makes a distinction for rape: “Only the man who has done this shall die. Do nothing to the woman; she has committed no sin deserving death” (Deuteronomy 22:25-26).
Nothing you can do would ever make rape or assault your fault, God already made that clear in His laws from the beginning. You did not deserve it. Rape is a sin, but it’s not your sin; it’s the sin of the person who harmed you against your will.
- BELIEVE YOU ARE STILL VALUABLE:
Rape victim is not who you are. You are a son or daughter of the God who made the universe.
Your value comes from God not from the act. He created you, and He is the only one who can define you. You are not dirty or used up. You were fearfully and wonderfully made by a loving God (Psalm 139).
God proved His love for you and your value to Him by sending His Son to earth to remove the sin gap between God and His people once and for all. Just consider the beginning of one of the most famous verses in the Bible, “For God so loved the world that he gave his one and only Son, that whoever believes in him shall not perish but have eternal life” (John 3:16).
If you have never asked Jesus into your life, reading this, let Him meet you where you are right now. Through Jesus, we’re able to have a relationship with God, which comes with some incredible benefits which comprises of hope and healing for today and forever.
- YOU ARE STILL IN A SAFE PLACE:
Being rapes in the church or mosque doesn't signify that the place isn't a place of refuge anymore. It doesn't say God has failed us. Sometimes, we feel like we have to get our stuff together before we can come to church. But one way God speaks to us, heals us and comforts us is through His people. When you’ve experienced a trauma like rape, you need to connect with other Christians who love you and will walk through this with you with trust.
Healing happens as we bring the dark parts of our past into the light. One of Jesus’ close friends, John, describes how this works, writing, “God is light; in him there is no darkness at all. If we claim to have fellowship with him and yet walk in the darkness, we lie and do not live out the truth. But if we walk in the light, as he is in the light, we have fellowship with one another, and the blood of Jesus, his Son, purifies us from all sin” (1 John 1:5-7).
When we keep what was done to us to ourselves, we give the hurt, the pain, and the shame the perfect place to grow, taking over our hearts like mold spores multiplying in darkness. To move forward requires us to open the door to our hearts, allowing Jesus and others to shed light on the sins committed against us and the lies we believed about them.
BRIEFED WAYS OUT OF THE TRAUMA:
1. Discussing The Rape Incidence With Someone Trustworthy.
2. Assure Yourself That It's Not Your Fault.
3. Don't Beat Yourself So Hard Over Its Remembrance.
4. Bring Your Soul Back To Life By Being Strong Again.
5. Enjoin Yourself In The Circle Of Most Trusted Ones.
6. Breed Yourself Not To Be Breed.
Thanks for reading!!!
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© ODERINDE TAIWO JOEL
DR. HESPEY
